Feelings All Wrong
by Nobody's perfect
Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA. !.!Complete!.!
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Feelings All Wrong**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them although I would like to they belong to fox blah, blah woof, woof.**

**Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA.**

**Time: It's after freak nation but every one has accepted them and they are allowed to walk around, the virus is still there. So I guess it's an AU.**

**Chapter 1 – Telling Someone Different**

Max was sitting in crash with sketchy and O.C while Alec had gone to get a pitcher of beer,

"So boo why aint ya at Logan's house tonight?"

"I didn't want to go I'm felling kinda tired ya no with the entire ruling freak nation thing." she said in a quiet voice, O.C looked at her not convinced. Max sighed and leaned back as Alec came with the pitcher of beer,

"So how bout we go play a game of pool sketch leave original Cindy and max to catch up on girly stuff." He knew what they were talking about. Logan, and the glares from Original Cindy were helping a little bit to.

"Yeah dude your on but tonight's the night I'm gonna wipe you out clean"

"Yup your really gonna do that" he said while raising one eyebrow and walking over to the pool table a few girls were checking him out, Max scoffed, O.C. heard it and looked towards her friend slightly confused.

**XxxoxxX**

"So boo what the real reason you aint with Logan tonight…?" O.C asked scooting a little closer to max.

"Because he might have the cure for the virus…and I…" she said trailing off,

"I thought you want that boo?" she threw max a confused expression again,

"Boo you do want that don't you?" O.C looked more closely at her friend's features.

"I do…but I don't…" she pushed back against the chair her frustration leaping out at her friend's question.

"That's the point I don't know what I want" it looked like she was about to carry on so O.C helped her pick it up again

"Go on" Max looked down at her hand which was playing with the rim of the pitcher; she looked up from her hands and began,

"Well I keep on having this dream…"

**Dream**

_Max was running her feet banging off the cold pavement and rain pelting down on her. Her thoughts kept on drifting back to this one thought. Alec. He had told her to leave so it wasn't her fault but her brain kept telling her it was and her heart was telling her to go back and get him 'Screw this I need him' She thought angrily she ran and ran until she came back to where she'd been before; Alec was lying on the floor blood all over him a gun shot wound in his side. She lifted him up under the arms and proceeded to get him on her bike, white wasn't there she could use it now,_

"_Max…" he whispered in a horse voice _

"_Don't talk save your breath, tell me later"_

"_What if there is no later max…I …have to say…this" he managed to push out,_

"_There will be just hang on please for me," she half begged him._

"_Max I… need to say this Pl…please let me." He stuttered out_

"_NO" she cried_

"_Because you're going tell me later when everything's okay" she stated in a more gentle tone._

_BACK AT ALECS_

_Max got Alec into bed after cleaning his wounds, she sat there by his side all night and didn't move, she was taking in all his features and whispering comforting words gently close to his ear, out of no where she said quietly,_

"_I love you note that I always will" he was sleeping peacefully he'd forgotten to tell her what he had wanted to say his face lit up as she whispered to him but then clouded as he opened his eyes to take in who had just told him those three most important words. 'No she doesn't love me she can't she doesn't mean it it's a brotherly love kind of way and I no it' he said silently to himself as his eyes began to shut._

**End of Dream**

"And at that point I _always_ wake up, I can't stand it. O.C. what does it mean your big on this kind of thing…help…I mean I tell him I _love _him!" max said emphasizing the _help, _making puppy dog eyes at her although this was no joke. She really needed to know and she'd do almost anything to find out. '_Almost' _she mused.

"Boo sounds like you got some issues with the love bug…Girl you like hot boy!" O.C. exclaimed loudly but not loud enough for anyone near to hear. Max sat back and sighed deeply 'this is wrong!' she thought but unusually she didn't try to fight it.

**Ok so what do you think about it RR please. The whole story's going to be like 3 chapters long just thought I'd let you know :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: Feelings All Wrong**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them although I would like to they belong to fox blah, blah woof, woof.**

**Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA. (Sorry for the Logan bashing people but this is a MA…sorry again.)**

**Time: It's after freak nation but every one has accepted them and they are allowed to walk around, the virus is still there. So I guess it's an AU.

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**Chapter 2 – Could I? **

Max started up the stairs to the Foggle towers, wondering what was so important that she had to get there 'super fast' just like he'd said. She didn't like him any more she could tell by the way he annoyed her, she found his talking boring, his short scruffy beard was horrible, but what annoyed her even more was that she knew she liked Alec he didn't have the scruffy beard he defiantly was NOT boring she liked everything about him. She finally got to the doors of Logan's house and she wondered if she should tell him now how she felt or later. Now. '_Better now than never.'_ She walked through the doors and came into his computer room,

"Hey"

"Hey you're self"

"So what was so important?"

"Hmmmm. Look at this…" he said handing her the letter from Dr. Suki, he was beaming like a little boy who's just got praised on something that made him feel really special. She read through it carefully her eyes growing bigger from each line she read. She couldn't tell him now but he did need to know_, 'I can't just tell him now, he's found a cure I'll tell him after I'm cured, yeah I'll do that but will it always feel this weird being around him?'_

"This is real not a fake there is a cure, no lie" she asked praying that the answer would be a no and she go on to tell him how she really felt but she knew that with her luck that kind of thing wasn't possible. She looked up at him and saw that big smile on his face and she couldn't bring herself to tell him what she felt about Alec.

"Yes, Max this is our chance to finally be happy together, you want it right…" He asked his smile fading quickly into a frown,

"Max?" He questioned curiously his eyebrows rising but still trace of a frown left seeping through his new expression.

"Yeah of course I want this" she said quickly putting on a fake smile, one luckily for her he couldn't see through, if Alec were here he would of known that it wasn't genuine. _'Why do my thoughts keep drifting back to him?' _she thought angrily.

"So…um…I gotta blaze Cya" with that she took off without looking back she really wanted to cry now she didn't even know why. She ran down the stairs trying her best to keep her emotions stable but she didn't know how much longer she could hold it up, she bumped into a hard chest in the car park,

"Sorry" she looked up into hazel eyes and her breath caught in her throat and her heart jumped into her mouth, there he was the one person who could cause so much but take it all away again, the one she couldn't live without but probably couldn't live with, the one who could take her breath away by just being in the same room as her. Alec clicked his fingers to get her attention but what he didn't know was he already had her full attention. She pulled out of her trance when she herd him click his fingers she focused her eyes to his and he said,

"Hey Max what's the matter you looked kind of zoomed out for a minute there. You okay?" he asked looking straight into her dark chocolate orbs she replied looking away,

"Yeah why wouldn't I be?" she turned to him again looking him in the eyes again "And If I wasn't what makes you think I'd tell you?" it killed her to say those things she wished so badly that he could just pull her in his arms and hold her and never let go. Ever.

"Look Max I was just making sure you were okay, next time I won't bother, I'm so sorry for trying to help out a friend if I can call you that." He walked away forgetting why he'd gone there in the first _'I'll come back _later' he thought I'm not going in there while she's there. She stood still as she watched him walk away _'How can I be so horrible to him'_ she thought sadly _'God Max he was just trying to help!' _she said scolding herself over something that had never mattered in the past, It was probably one of the hardest things she had to do now in her life, be so disrespectful to some one she loved deeply be around him every single day and him not know how she really felt. At that moment she let a solitary tear fall down her cheeks burning as it ran down she immediately wiped it away roughly, she walked over to her bike mounted it and drove off.

**LATER**

Alec sat on the couch in Logan's house scanning all his valubles with his eyes darting about,

"Hey Alec so I got a job for you to do…"

"Okay are you gonna tell me about it?"

"Yeah but you can't tell Max and it's got to be done tonight okay?"

"Yeah but first you gotta tell me what I need to do!" he said with a touch of sarcasm in his voice _'I wonder why he doesn't want max knowing? oh Well' _when Logan had finished explaining he got up and walked out of the apartment wondering why the hell on earth he would want him to go to a warehouse to get some cheesy little bottle. He got on his bike and continued to his destination. After about an hour of driving he finally reached coast line warehouse, he jumped of his bike and began to sneak to the doors _'Logan had told me there was gonna be a lot of security I wonder where they are?' _he thought soundlessly while creeping towards the door of the warehouse he herd a gun click and was about to turn around then he felt someone familiar breathing down his neck the gun was pushed against his temple,

"What a coincidence to see you 494, may I ask why you are here?" the man said from behind him his voice was low and hard as he spoke again,

"494 I'm going to ask you again and this time you are going to answer me correctly ok?" Alec swallowed hard and he replied,

"Hey I just wanted to check this place out it looks like a nice place to get a lovely cup a tea what an earth are you doing here?" he said again with the sarcastic dealio he then felt the gun push closer to his head and the mans finger got tighter around the trigger again Alec swallowed hard,

"I'm going to ask my question again and this time you are going to answer it right what the hell are you doing in my warehouse…?"

He tightly closed his eyes as he herd more and more guard surrounded them. The man pushed him to one of the guard and called to him,

"Take him in he'll help" under his breath he said "I hope" which didn't go unnoticed by Alec he knew what it meant and he prayed to himself that Max didn't care enough to come looking for him, from the stories Max had told him he prayed to the blue lady too.

**Logan's**

"Thank you so much for this doctor, Eyes Only owes you big time for this I'll personally make sure he doesn't forget it, thank you again" Logan stood in the door way looking the man who had made all him dreams come true again.

"It's my pleasure to help out Eyes Only I'll keep in touch Mr. Cale" with that he walked off Logan looked at the small glass bottle filled with a deep yellow substance 'I can't wait till I tell max she's going to be so happy!' he thought, the phone ringing brought him out of all his thoughts, he went to answer it quickly trying to think of who it might be he picked it up and the voice was cold and oh so familiar,

"Hello Eyes Only I've got 494 here just liked you wanted is there anything you'd like to say to him before he meets his maker, oh by the way I'll have the cure delivered to you're apartment soon so…" before he could continue Logan interrupted him,

"I don't need the cure any more , but I would like you to let 494 know that me and Max are happy together now…thank you Amse I'll be in touch" He hung up the phone smiling what he didn't know was that some was standing behind him.

**Tbc…

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**Hey thanks for reading guys please review the next chappi will be up soon hopefully I'll try…thank you again! ****P.SI hope you're all enjoyimg it**


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: Feelings All Wrong**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them although I would like to they belong to fox blah, blah woof, woof.**

**Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA. (Sorry for the Logan bashing people but this is a MA…sorry again.)**

**Time: It's after freak nation but every one has accepted them and they are allowed to walk around, the virus is still there. So I guess it's an AU.**

**A/N: I am so sorry for the long update but nothing would come to me…I hope you like this one I might drag it on for more than 3-4 chapters depending on what you guys think, because I could just finish this in 4 chapters so tell me what you think review or e-mail I don't mind. Thanks to all people who have been reading and reviewing this story you're my inspiration! **

**Chapter 3 – And the memories begin**

Ames white clicked down the phone and wondered back into the building he saw Alec sat in the middle of a small room on a wooden chair through the glass window in the hall. He began to walk in a haste to get to Alec to see what he had to say, _'Maybe 452 will have told him where my son is? Maybe he can lead me to that bitch' _his thoughts trailed off as he got to the door where Alec was now being held, slowly he opened the door.

"494 what a pleasure…" he said as his lips took on a sly smirk; the smirk fell quickly as Alec came at him with his normal witty come backs,

"No, No, the pleasures all mine you don't have to take any credit" the same smirk white had, had just minutes ago was now upon Alecs face soon to be wiped off. Whites had connected with Alec's jaw line causing the X5 to turn with the strike, the powerfulness of the older man was enough to knock out a normal person but luckily for Alec he wasn't normal, far from it. The smirk still played on his lips as another blow came at him this time he moved but a little to late Whites hand crashed into his nosed making it bleed yet the smirk was still there not as strong as when he had first put it there but it was there enough to notice. White features had changed now his eyes hard staring at Alec daring him to talk more. His body posture had changed greatly to; his shoulders were broad and he had one foot in front of the other, slightly tapping the foot in front gently to the floor as if he was waiting for something. He was looking around the room as if searching for something that wasn't there when he finally brought his attention back to Alec, who was now slouching in the seat his arms crossed and his two feet tapping the floor randomly, he looked at his brows drawing in with annoyance.

"Shut up, I'm trying to think!" white bellowed Alec felt a smile tugging at his lips, he had annoyed him he was truly happy now. A guard came in and whispered something to White the walked out of the room together which left Alec alone. He was to far away to hear what had been said even with his super hearing although he would've said that was the reason he was so tired his eyes were droopy but he could stay awake, he hopped.

**Logan's**

"How could you say that to him!" she yelled anger present in her voice and also in her posture she tried to calm down she really did but no matter what she did or thought his words echoed through her head '_she loathes you, you know that right you know she'd do anything to get you away from her away from her life from her family' _she didn't understand why he's done it said it now Alec was gone probably never coming back not even to visit her.

"Max…" Logan tried

"No save it I don't want to hear it" she said slow and loud to make sure she got her point across to him.

"Max. White has him…white has Alec." He said it with fake sympathy though she didn't notice she was trying to think straight, she hadn't told Logan the truth but she knew it was coming she could feel the harsh words she had on her tongue. As much as she tried she couldn't hold it in not any more _'White has him, white has my best friend, my lover, my rock' _she thought to herself she suddenly felt so alone like no one was going to be there for her, like she had just lost everything, like nothing was left on the earth, no people nothing. so she said her voice almost cracking through her well held mask,

"We have to find him Logan; he means so much to me. Do you have any idea where white could be holding him?" She rushed on before he could answer "Because if you do this is the time to say it because I'm going to find him I'll search alone if I have to but I'm sure my family would be there looking along with me. Are you helping or not?" as the word came from her mouth she grew more confident and Logan suddenly felt really small he hadn't realized how much he actually ment to max probably more than his computers ment to him 'no way way less than that'

"Are you helping?" she shouted at him becoming more and more annoyed by each passing second.

"Yes, of course I'll help. When will we give up though?" he asked not realizing how mad she was at him at this moment in time, but when he saw the look on her face he was truly glad that he hadn't given her the cure yet truly glad.

"Logan Cale you. Are. So. Self centered. We don't need you damn help!" she bellowed at his as loud as she could she knew it wouldn't help any thing or any one but she needed to let out some of the anger she had caged up. 'Now Alec isn't even here to let some of my anger out on' she turned so fast on her heel Logan was surprised she hadn't twisted her ankle she moved so fast it didn't look like her foot had moved at all, before he could argue she was out the door slamming It be hide her.

Space Needle

Max sat atop the space needle thinking about when all her emotions had suddenly changed into something completely different, for a man she had once despised she now loved, a man she had once 'loved' she despised but then she thought back to when he had fought beside her never not once left her no matter what she had said then she remembered what she had said to him early yesterday _'Yeah why wouldn't I be? And If I wasn't what makes you think I'd tell you?'_ she could see the pain and hurt in his eyes and she just let all her inner emotions out she cried and cried until she had no more tears to cry even the she stayed and thought about the bad time with him she just couldn't forget it, but then she remembered a happy time and through her tear stained cheeks and pained face she smiled just remembering that one time

Flash Back _(Max's POV)_

_'I sat on his bed watching him sleep. It made me feel special that he could let his guard down enough for him to fall into a deep slumber._

_He looked so peaceful, so cute. Of course I would never tell him that, he was my best friend. And like the best friend he was he understood me like no one else. He knew the kind of things that I had to go through at nine years old because he had to do it too. It made me uneasy thinking about Manticore all the things they did to him. I stroked his left cheek gently and moved to the out line of his lips with my little finger a small smile played on his lips as he caught my hand and pulled me down to his chest he kissed my forehead and rubbed my back soothingly. I closed my eyes enjoying the feel of his body close to mine. He held me so tight I thought I was going to die but it was nice, I felt secure in his embrace I know it didn't mean anything but I wanted it to. I looked at him and yet again I found my self watching my angel sleep, he opened his eyes and saw me staring at him but I didn't care that he'd caught me out because I just wanted to do it all day I locked my eyes with his and told him I loved him and he told it me back. He thought I meant in a friend kinda' way but I didn't. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to ruin what we had with each other so we lay in each others arms content, just as friends. Only as friends._

End of flash back _(Not in Max's POV)_

Her smile faded as she thought of what must be happening to him, 'her angel' she let more tears streak her already wet cheeks, following the routes the other tears took as she looked out at the sun setting. The orange, red, yellow, purple merging into the deep, dark sky that covered the town. She just wanted him back holding her like he did that night, she wanted to feel the security again, she wanted to know that he was coming back but she didn't know and it killed her that her last words to him had been so harsh towards him she decided then to make the promise that when she found him she would tell him about how she _really_ felt.

**Ok guys I hope you liked it, there wasn't much dialog sorry but tell me if you loved or hated it. If it was a bit out of character I'm really sorry. I really, really need to know if it was good or not and is the description ok usually I don't bother writing a lot of description but hey look at this one. And I'm also sorry to keep on talking for ages so I'm gonna stop now. (Hehe) **

**xAmyx**


	4. Chapter 4

**Title: Feelings All Wrong**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them although I would like to they belong to fox blah, blah woof, woof.**

**Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA. (Sorry for the Logan bashing people but this is a MA…sorry again.)**

**Time: It's after freak nation but every one has accepted them and they are allowed to walk around, the virus is still there. So I guess it's an AU.**

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Chapter 4 – Will this help? 

Max wondered into TC and into the control room where Joshua, Luke and mole we're arguing about when and where they were going to move out of TC, with no luck. Max stood listening to them for about two minutes before Joshua caught a glimpse of her,

"Hey little fella, you okay?" he asked seeing her looking like she'd just saw a ghost.

"Yeah josh has got a point Max, you okay?" Mole agreed.

"Yep, you look like you just saw a ghost." Luke joined in at the last minute, her skin which was usually dark, was now very, very pale she looked as if she'd been ill for a long time and only just managed the strength to get out of her bed. All three of them were worried for her and the news that was coming.

"Um…guys listen…" she trailed off trying to control all her emotions so she wouldn't break down _'Come on max, there gonna' help get him back!' _The little voice in the back of her head reminded her. Now Joshua, Luke and mole were even more worried she could tell by the looks on their faces they were trying to urge her on. She couldn't cry in front of them she didn't want to so she took a deep breath and continued,

"So…um…Where was I…Oh yeah…Listen guys we got a big problem…White is back" She took another deep breath "And he has Alec." The looks on their faces hadn't changed it was like they didn't care almost. Joshua's expression changed the first then Luke's but for so strange reason the lizard man's face didn't change yet he was the one who spoke first.

"So you know where he's holding him? I mean has he taken him out of the country 'coz max if he has you know we can't go get him we're not even aloud passed the boarder…how did he let this happen. Pretty boy must of' got caught up in something eh?" Mole raised his eyebrow then seeing the look on Max's face he put his hands to his head his and scratched, frustration clearly visible. Joshua let out a little cry, like a lost puppy. Max stood up and was at his side in a nanosecond,

"Joshua we're gonna' get him back and when we do I'm gonna kick his ass" Max said yet sadness and uncertainty was in her voice. She hugged the big dog man and he began to cry harder. Luke was just stood in shock his leader, one of his best friends had been captured by their adversary, he couldn't believe it but he knew he had to.

"When are we gonna' tell the rest about Alec, we need as much help as possible. Don't we? We are going to tell them aren't we?" Luke asked now fully aware of the situation. He was looking at Max for an expected answer, one she just didn't have. She knew that they needed as much help as possible but she also knew she didn't want to be the one telling everyone that one of their leaders had gone missing and into the arms of their enemy.

"Yes we do need as much help as humanly possible; we need people doing searches on computers in all sector checkpoints, surveillance camera's anything that can help us track down where white might be hid…"

"Max?" Some one from behind her interrupted her speech she turned around to come face to face with Zack.

"Zack?" she looked at him a smile formed on her lips then faded when she thought about what had happened, to him, and to Alec.

"What you not happy to see you're big brother?" Zack asked playfully. This was a completely different guy he was so much cheery but she liked it. She walked over to him and drew him into a big hug he acted on instinct and his arms wrapped around her tiny form protecting her.

"Maxie, what's wrong?" he asked gently rubbing her back soothingly as little sobs racked her body this wasn't like her. He motioned for the three nomlies to leave them to talk for little while. She felt Joshua rub her back reassuringly over Zack's before he left. Zack pulled back so he could see her properly but before he could see the tears that were dripping from her eyes she wiped them away quickly, seeing that Zack pulled her to him again tighter. All sorts of thoughts were running through his head he thought maybe Logan had died or maybe she'd just found out some really bad news, hey wouldn't Logan dying be bad news, nah. He tried again hoping he'd get more out of her than crying this time,

"Maxie are you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to ask some one else?" she pulled away looking into his eyes, finding it difficult because her eyes were shimmering with tears not yet run down her wet cheeks.

"There's this man called Ames White he's kind of like Lydecker but worse, he was sent out to kill the transgenics after I burnt down Manticore he's been after us in Seattle for awhile now. After we got the license to walk around freely from the government he seemed to disappear but he came back we've been avoiding him since h…he came back about 2-3 weeks ago but late last night I found out he'd got one of our men.

He's called Alec and he's my second in command." She broke down completely then if Zack wasn't holding her she'd be on the ground in a ball crying. Joshua, Luke and mole were watching from outside through the gap in the blinds and to be honest they had never seen any-one ever react to loosing a man like Max was. Failing missions maybe, but not likely, not ever loosing one man. They all knew why she was acting like this it was a shame she didn't know either, they didn't know that she did know. Zack took her hand and led her to a tatty coach that was in the control room, he sat down and she followed resting her head on his shoulder while he made soothing circular patterns on her back, like when they were children after a seizure.

"So…Max what's got you so hooked on finding this one guy…why can't you just let him go?" There was the Zack she knew. She smiled when she remembered how he used to act before he died and came back. She really did love the other Zack she just like this one's attitude better, being on that farm for a year or two must have done him good. 'Just tell him straight max he _is_ you're big brother how bad can it be?' If you can't tell you're brother who can you tell?

"Because I'm in love with him" she stated very quietly if he hadn't of been transgenic he wouldn't have caught any of that statement. He felt what he thought was jealousy hit him, he wasn't completely sure. Outside she could hear lots of people saying 'I knew it!' or 'Why didn't she tell us early I mean we already knew' she chuckled and Zack just looked confused.

"Are you sure…" he saw he nod her head, "Just for that we'll get him back. I'm leading!" Zack announced, and then looked down at her with what looked like a sort of worried expression. He had really changed since the whole farm dealio.

"If that's okay with you?" he added quickly after she didn't say anything, Max chuckled again he was really trying to help make her smile again but no one could do that better than Alec. She fell asleep in the control's room on Zack that night, dreaming about 'her angel'.

**XxxoxxX**

**Okay that's this chapter out of the way chapter 5 is probably the last one and will be up shortly because I've already started writing it. I'm so sorry if Zack was out of characterI blamed it on the farm!**

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**REVIEW PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Title: Feelings All Wrong**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them although I would like to they belong to fox blah, blah woof, woof.**

**Summary: Max Realizes Something And Needs To Tell Someone But Will That Someone Want To Believe It? MA. (Sorry for the Logan bashing people but this is a MA…sorry again.)**

**Time: It's after Freak Nation but every one has accepted them and they are allowed to walk around, the virus is still there. So I guess it's an AU.**

**A/N: I've started another Dark Angel story called 'Just an Assignment' it's MA you read it and tell me what you think…please. Lol**

**A/N2: Thank you all for reading my story and most of all thank you to all the people who reviewed this is the last chapter! I might do another chapter explaining more about what happened to Logan? If you want…**

Chapter 5 – And then the bomb explodes…

"Hello Eyes Only, what can I do for you?"

"Ames is there a chance I can trade anything, anything with you for you to spare 494's life?" Logan practically begged. He needed Max back, even if she wasn't madly in love and living with him, he needed her to be talking to him at least!

"You should know I don't like people taking back their deals, anyway no can do, the guy's already dead…sorry for you're loss" Logan was about to say something but the other end of the phone went dead. "Damn!" He put the phone down on the hook and ran his hands through his hair.

"If Max finds out she'll kill me…" he whispered to nobody but himself little did he know he was not alone.

"If Max finds out what?" and hard voice startled him from behind he spun around to be met by a pair of cold murky green eyes. Looking over the mans body he could tell he was badly hurt._ 'No…it can't be'_

"If Max finds out what?" he repeated again this time taking a step towards him Logan took a step back again the man moved towards him Logan again moved back he did the same again as did Logan. This time Logan didn't get a chance to step back the man grabbed him by the throat Logan saw him wince from the sudden movement that had startled his wounds.

"I won't repeat myself after this; what will Max kill you about after she finds out…what was it you said?" The man still holding Logan spat out through gritted teeth. Logan slowly going slightly blue dew to not getting enough air, tried to talk but failed and spat in the males face instead of getting any words out even though he didn't mean it, he really didn't want to get this man any angry than he already was. The man let go of him realizing he couldn't talk when his and was around his throat, he motioned for Logan to tell him now his hand was gone.

"Okay is everyone ready?" Max shouted out to her team; 4 X5 males, 3 nomlies, 2 field med X series and Zack. Max began to open the gates when Luke called out to her to stop,

"Max wait there's something you should see!" She looked at Zack and saw him shake his head no.

"Can it wait?" she yelled

"There'll be no need for the mission something's just come through" Luke yelled back at her. She immediately ran through the crowd of X's up to the control room where Luke had shouted out to her, and there he was lying on the couch where her had Zack had slept the night before. She carefully took in his appearance; he had small abrasions and bruising to his head, deep knife wounds in his chest though they were beginning to heal, burn marks near the top of his chest. She scanned more carefully this time making sure she didn't miss anything and she caught a glimpse of a gun shot wound, or what looked like it, it had been banged up, in his side just below his ribs.

She began to make her way slowly towards his side, she touched his head he was cold for an X5 and very pale. She lifted his t-shirt to see his wound properly and it was really bad, the blood had almost filled the length of the bandage_. 'White's going to seriously pay for this I'll make sure of that…'_ she thought coldly to herself a voice brought her out of her train of thoughts

"Luke get some X's to help get him over to TC's infirmary please" her eyes tearing up although she was doing a really good job at keeping them from falling. He had lost a lot of blood he had dark rings under his eyes, big dark. Zack came up and touched her shoulder.

"Max why don't we go back to your apartment and you can have a shower and something to eat…" he trailed off she wasn't looking at him her face was now emotionless.

"Yeah Max why don't you get some sleep you look a bit tired" Luke quipped in. The people from the infirmary had come and were waiting patiently outside the office door

"I'm gonna go see if he's okay" she said quietly still not looking at them. They were really worried now she had gone incredibly pale considering she wasn't ill in any way and her voice was low and quiet as if she was loosing it and it was getting more difficult to speak but they knew she wouldn't say any thing it wasn't her to say how she felt.

**4 hours later. Outside the infirmary **

"Hey Max you asked someone to call me?"

"Hi Sam…Yeah um…it's Alec he's in a pretty bad condition." Her voice almost breaking thinking back to a couple of hours ago.

"_Max we're really sorry we can't doing any thing else to help him his lungs are punctured we're surprised he lasted as long as he did." She looked at them with tears yet again brimming in her eyes. "Max he's not dead yet but he's not gonna last for much longer unless we get a good doctor and although people have excepted us there won't be anyone willing to come to Terminal City to help one of us out will there? We are stilled feared greatly Max he's on a life support machine but like I said he won…" the transgenic was interrupted by Max,_

"_How long will he last?" she asked all thoughts of Sam Carr running through her head._

"_It's hard to say, maybe another 3 hours on the machine…Max I wouldn't get you're hopes up he might pass in less time…"_

"_Keep him as long as you can I can get professional help." She said more confidante than ever._

"_Max…" the young doctor trailed off when she saw Max turn on her heel._

He looked at her intently her eyes were watering but no tears fell down, she had huge dark rings under her eyes now, she'd been up from about 6 o'clock in the morning preparing for the mission, and Sam also noticed she was a little bit shaky.

"Okay where is he?" he asked softly. Max looked up and started walking slowly to where Alec was lying in his hospital room, she gestured for Sam to follow and that's what he did, they finally got to the room he was staying in and Max looked through the small window in the door, he was so pale paler than he was she saw the steady rise and fall of his chest and was grateful they had kept him for this long. She didn't know what she'd do if Sam couldn't help him.

"Please, Sam, don't let him die, please." She begged her eyes silently pleading him. He walked through the doors and closed them behind him. Max stood outside waiting for him to finish. After 4 long hours of waiting for Max, Sam walked out of the doors his coat covered in Alec's blood. Max stood up from where she'd been sat and walked towards Sam when she stood before him she saw the look on his face,

"Oh god. Please tell me you could save him, please…please" tears ran freely down her face she hadn't heard whether he was okay yet and she was crying unaccountably she tried to stop the tears from flowing, but it only made it worse.

"Max…Alec's lost _a lot_ of blood but I'd be very surprised if he didn't make it. His heart stopped beating twice and he'll need a transfusion but he looks better already" he moved away from the door so she could see him and he did look a hell of a lot better than when he'd first come in. Max threw her arms around Sam and she mumbled how grateful she was that he'd saved him over and over again.

She slowly stepped back and Zack came back with her drink, surprised to see her smiling,

"Must be good eh?" He said Max ran up to him and drew him into a big hug, which he found hard to reply to because he had the drinks in his hands. She buried her head in his neck while he did the best he could do to rub her back.

"He's going to be okay," she said quietly and softly she pulled back. "Sam can I go in?" she asked hopefully, "I'll give him the transfusion, please" she looked at him hopefully, he looked towards Zack's hard face staring back at him and didn't know what to say, whether to tell her that she had to rest or that she could go and see him and give him the blood he needed.

"…Um…yeah sure you can Max but we better get someone else's blood you're not looking all that good and you're pretty tired so, I really think some one else should transfuse him." He said praying silently that he'd said the right thing so Zack wouldn't be mad; he really was quite protective of Max.

"Okay…" she said and took a deep breath steadying herself to go in and see him.

**In the hospital room.**

She walked in and sat down in the chair that was beside his bed Sam came in and hooked a bag of blood to his arm so it was flowing and no one else had to be in the room with them.

"Thank you, Sam. I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't of come today." She said,

"Just returning the favors you've done for me in the past. You're a friend Max and I'd have done it even if you hadn't have done anything but put me in danger. I think." Max laughed softly and he started to walk again she watched him until he was out of the room, then she looked back at Alec's still form. She put her head on his chest careful of his wounds and closed her eyes comforted by his firm heart beat beneath her.

He stirred then stilled as he felt a bit of pressure on his chest he looked down to see a sleeping Max, and smiled a bit. He was so sure they'd gotten closer during their time keeping Terminal City alive, not that it was hard; most people had stayed there anyway. Then that day at Logan's, the same day he'd been taken in by White had changed all of those thoughts back into his dreams. He'd endured so much during those days at White's facility, he stayed alive for Max, he'd just thought of her to stay strong. He'd even admitted to White he loved her.

Flashback

_He sat on the small, hard wooden chair provided especially for him, while White prodded him with the tazor sending huge electric shocks running through his body one after the other. And he'd admit it hurt like hell but he wouldn't let White have that little bit of satisfaction of him crying out in pain._

"_We'll wait for you're little girlfriend to come to rescue you…" White trailed off as he jolted another stream of electricity though Alec. Alec looked at him hard trying his best not to wince and to his look he didn't but it'd be changing soon if he didn't get out._

"_She's not my girlfriend…and she won't come!"_

"_You want her to be you're girlfriend though don't you 494? You wish she'd get over that Logan boy and come to you, give all her love to you…but she won't because you're worthless. Worthless filth. If I killed you now you'd have nothing to loose, if I kept you alive you'd gain nothing. Why are you still living 494? Let me guess you still have just a smear of hope that she'll love you, that you'll grow old together. Ask me to kill you, beg me…" he trailed off when he herd Alec say something._

"_Come again?"_

"_I said you're right, I want her to love me, I love her. There's nothing I can do about that…so kill me go on do it! But if you do you'll never see Ray again…" he trailed off and closed his eyes so he didn't cry he loved Max and she didn't know and she wouldn't ever because now he was going to die._

End of flashback

Max woke up when he stirred and she looked up to see his worried green eyes,

"What's wrong…are you okay?" she said panicking.

"Max I'm fine. Just you scared me a little I didn't expect to see you in here. I mean I didn't ask for you here. No that came out wrong……I mean like I didn't ask the doctor for you. I didn't know if you were going to be mad at me and ignoring me." He was babbling now so he just shut his mouth.

"I'll go if you want…" she started to get up but she felt a tight grip wrap around her wrist she looked at him into his eyes, she could get lost in them. She'd almost lost him, if he'd of…died she'd never get to see his perfect hazel eyes again. Ever. The tears came again they spilled down her cheeks and yet again she couldn't stop them, she turned her head away instead hiding the streams falling from him.

"Max I didn't mean it…I'm sorry. Max look at me please. Please?" he said softly never taking his eyes off her. She didn't turn around and he felt his heart constrict painfully at her actions, he let go of her wrist and relaxed back onto the bed, he sighed and closed his eyes. He felt her arms wrap around him carefully so as not to hurt him. She began to cry full on sobs stuttered through her form. Alec could feel and hear she sobbing, real sobbing, he managed to put his arms around her and rub her back slowly in lazy circles.

"I…I thought I…I'd lost you…That…I'd never see…see you again…and it hurt." She choked out between sobs. He moved over on the bed so she could climb up and he could comfort her. She rested her head on his shoulder as he continued rubbing her back soothingly.

Her crying had finally ceased, and she drifted off to sleep. When he heard her even breathing and he knew she was asleep he placed a kiss on her forehead.

"I love you Maxie…that's what kept me going. Why I wake up in the morning. It's a new day right maybe just maybe I stand a chance with you, but I know it's not right you love Logan and he loves you and telling you that I love you would be selfish. I can't hold onto anymore I just want to hold you to kiss you and take away your pain. I love you more than there are thoughts or words, more than there are stars or feelings. And I can't control it any more, but I need you in my life you're what keeps it all worth while." He let out all the feelings he'd been holding in for 5 years now. He didn't even have the gut to tell her while she was awake.

"See I'm a coward I can't even tell you that…I have to wait for you to go to sleep!" he said getting angry with himself.

He was going to be so pissed at her but he had to know, "Alec?"

"Shit!" he brought his hand to his head, "Did you hear me?"

"Yes…but before you take it back…I… I l-love you too" she said quietly, hoping he'd heard her.

"What about Logan…?"

"Forgotten…I need you. When I thought you were dead I almost died…sound funny but I mean it. I just got this feeling…I can't explain it!" she sighed and relaxed on him.

"I love you Max." he said

"I love you too Alec" she replied before drifting off into a deep slumber just like that night they shared not so long ago, but they were going to have more nights like this.

**Outside the hospital room.**

Zack stood watching Max and Alec and thought he shouldn't ruin it by his mood or news in fact he should never ruin it. 'Just go Zack while she's happy…leave when she has someone like him to take care of her. He was Manticore's 'top dog' with that thought he walked out of Terminal City and into the world again. He had to find the others and that's what he'd do.

"Goodbye Maxie" he said into the cold air and began on the mission he made himself.

**Okay that's where I'm going to end it, IF it's not too much of a cliff hanger. Thank you to all you lovely people who reviewed and read, it was my first ff so…I'm sorry if it wasn't all that good but I tried and I'm still learning! Remember to check out Just an Assignment and review.**

**REVIEW THIS CHAPTER PLEASE!**


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